DEAD ANIMALS... LOVE... and LIES

Classy title, right?



    The first dead animal tale is dedicated to my cat, Miss Kitty. I was one of those kids whose pet was pretty much my best friend. So you can forgive me when, at thirteen, I harshly called my little brother’s babysitter a murderer, when she let our cat out of the house and it got hit by a car. I came home from Girl’s Camp and received the news. Begging my parents to let me see the cat, my dad told me that unfortunately he had buried it. I asked to see the grave, and after a few minutes pause, he told me he would take me after church the following day.


    It was so fitting, to be in our Sunday dress as we drove miles out past the river, to the small altar of stones where my beloved cat was buried. I said goodbye.


    After we were married, my dad was recalling the tale of Miss Kitty to Barry, and all of the sudden the story sounded different… something about a dumpster behind the Stake Center. WHAT?!?! Shocked, I asked him what he was talking about, and he said, “Did I never tell you?” He then told me the REAL story. He had already thrown the cat in a dumpster when I had asked to see it. So he actually drove miles out of town (on a dirt road by the river) and staged a fake grave site so his daughter could find peace of mind. I CAN’T BELIEVE HE THREW AWAY MY CAT! But I also can’t believe that he did that for me!


It’s not very often a lying father shows how much he really cares.


STORY NUMBER 2-


    In 8th grade, our science class incubated duck eggs and watched them hatch. Before the big day, our teacher announced that we were allowed to take the ducks home… with permission. I floated home on a cloud as I told my parents I could have a duck! Then they smashed my dream to smithereens. I was devastated, until my friend Brittany said her parents were allowing her to take two ducks. One for herself, and one for me! We named them Oscar and Felix and they were our babies! We took them on a walk and they faithfully followed because, in one day, we were already their mommies.


    A few days after we brought our babies home, Brittany showed up to school, with swollen red eyes, she sought me out. “Our ducks died,” she solemnly whispered to me.


“What happened?” I wailed.


“I don’t know! They just died,” she answered. And that was that. My first shot of parenthood, and our babies were dead within a week. I cried my heart out, thinking that I wasn't there for them, or I had done something wrong.


    Four years later, as a senior in High School, Brittany finally told me the REAL story. That fateful night, she had this brilliant idea to let the ducks sleep with her in bed. And then she rolled over in the middle of the night. And how she didn't feel the sudden lumps in her mattress... I will never know.
   It makes me wonder if our hamsters really did die of old age. Or if our turtle really was released into the wild. Or if our bird really was given to a friend of the family. Maybe it’s all lies. LIES, I TELL YOU!